Why We're Contraception-Free

It was nighttime and we were at the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris, France when I knelt down on one knee, pulled out the ring box, and asked Krista if she would do me the honor of marrying me. The reply: "Yes with all my heart!" 
What can I say? We were young and in love, and Krista, my then-girlfriend, was studying abroad in France. Of course I had to fly out there to propose! I'd have been a fool to pass up such an opportunity. 
It was the Spring of our Junior year at Wheaton College and we had the plan to get married that summer just before our Senior year. Before deciding to propose, I had done a lot of work figuring out how we'd get by for the year while we both finished our degrees, looking into everything from financial aid and health insurance to housing and making a budget. But there was one thing that neither of us considered in the least bit: children.
And so begins "Part 1, Asking the Question" of my 6-part series "Why We're Contraception-Free". The series tells the true story of how two educated evangelical Protestants in love were of course planning on using contraception (everyone does), but had their plans turned upside after stumbling across a decades old document written by a long-dead pope.

You'll learn what made us change our mind to go contraception-free and what it's been like living it out - including how our new-found convictions have been tested significantly - but why we can't imagine living any other way.

Part 1: Asking the Question
Part 2: Flipping the Switch
Part 3: No Longer Afraid
Part 4: Hey Baby
Part 5: Tested Twice
Part 6: No Regrets
Post Script

16 comments:

  1. As a Wheaton and Fuller Seminary graduate and a recent convert to the Catholic Church, I pray that you will consider the fact that what you read is the product of the infallible teaching of the 2000-year-old Church that has taught the same gospel since the time of the apostles.

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    1. Wow, incredible story. Would love to hear more about that. And yes, you are right, there's a reason the Catholic Church has maintained the truth on this vitally important issue, and it's because the Church is exactly what she claims to be: Christ's Church. Yet even if someone didn't believe that, the truth is the truth, and any Protestant, or even non-Christian should be able to see that contraception is immoral and destructive and that going all natural is the better way to go. God bless

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    2. Brantly, Thanks for your reply. Obviously I had not read any of your other blogs. I just finished "How Quickly Catholic Heresy Took Over The Church. Sounds like you have made the leap across the Tiber. Welcome home. Sadly, despite a B.A. in Biblical Studies (Wheaton) and an M.A. in Theology (Fuller), it took me more than fifty years to finally recognize the need to actively explore why Protestantism had so many contradictions. Unlike you, my wife and I bought into the "blessing of contraception" as "we worked out God's plan for our lives". Now we are entering our sixties with only one child, born late, who will be alone to deal with our old age and entirely alone once we are gone. May God forgive us our selfishness. We have life success but an almost empty quiver. Yet, how blessed we are to receive the body, blood, soul and divinity or our Lord as Scripture instructs. God Bless you and your family. Wesley Vincent, Ph.D.

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    3. If my comments suggest I am ignorant of your movement to the Catholic faith, forgive me. Guess I should have read the title of your blog. This may be a sign of a need to slow down from a remarkably busy life. Wes

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    4. Wow, incredible story. lol I guess I didn't think you were directing your original comment to me, but perhaps to others reading. Glad to know you found your way to the Church. God bless

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  2. Thank you for your tremendous witness to the truth.

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  3. God bless you for this powerful and superbly-explained testimony!!! Countless numbers of people badly need to hear stories like this. Thank you for your admirable fidelity to conscience, though which the Lord speaks to all who sincerely seek the truth.
    May Christ & His Immaculate Mother guard and bless you and your family.

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    1. Br Timothy, Well praise the Lord. Yes, I think people sharing their stories is so important because it show people that another way is possible. Thanks for the encouragement! God bless

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  4. Thank you for your wonderful witness. I will use your story as I prepare people for marriage. Fr Adrian (Cleve.South Australia)

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    1. Anon (Fr Adrian),
      I honored you read it and think it could be helpful to those you prepare for marriage. God bless you in your ministry

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  5. Our precious earth is being destroyed by one thing -- the effects of overpopulation. Intelligent, responsible, and caring people use contraception methods because they want to leave a healthy world for their (planned) offspring. They realize that our world is finite and that the quality of life on earth is directly affected by the quantity of people who live in it. With all due respect to you and your beliefs, you are writing from a theoretical perspective only. While your academic experiences are impressive, I would recommend you expand on them by experiencing the real world and places where overpopulation has resulted in crushing poverty, unemployment, disease, crime, and hopelessness. Then, return to your writing. I know you will be wiser for it.

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    1. Hello Anon,
      It's interesting that you've brought this up, as population concerns has been a topic I've been studying quite a bit in the last few months. And in fact, I have spent time in poor areas of Mexico and India (the latter a common example of supposed overpopulation). Without getting into a debate about how overpopulation is defined, whether it's happening, etc, I will say that the Catholic position and the position I've argued for here does not say that people have to have as many kids as the possibly can no matter what. While I hold that the default for marriage should be to simply have sex and allow children to come, married couples that have a just cause may, and in fact, perhaps should, intentionally avoiding having more children (if you've read the series, you would have read in part 5 that my wife and I were in such a situation a few years ago). The question then is what method they should use. I argue that contraception and abortion are both contrary to nature and thus immoral. Rather, a couple should respect the natural order of their bodies and simply abstain from sex, at least when the woman is fertile.

      Thanks for engaging what I've written, I really appreciate it. Feel free to respond or not. God bless!

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  6. This is a wonderful story Brantly. I am a graduate of Philosophy too and since my graduation I have had numerous times of questioning the morality of the things that happen especially in my country(Uganda). We however dont have access to the vast reading material that you have there and as a result we tend to freeze infromt of the accusations and hatred that our christian counterparts aim at us Catholics. Thank you so much .

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    1. Anon,
      Thanks for reading and for commenting. I'll say a prayer for you guys in Uganda. God bless!

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  7. A secular blogger against contraception: paulmodrowski.blogspot.com

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